Survival Cooking

Hot Sauce for People Who Refuse to Apologize

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“A man who buys hot sauce is a man who outsources his pain tolerance. Grow some glands and make your own.” Listen up. Store-bought hot sauce is sugar water with delusions of grandeur. Real heat comes from three things: chiles worth respecting, oil that doesn’t quit, and the stones to handle both without crying to … Read more

White Rice for Anyone Who Refuse to Be Helpless

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“A man who can’t cook rice is a man one step removed from starvation—and that step is takeout.” Listen up. Rice isn’t just food. It’s the foundation of civilization, the fuel that built empires, and the difference between being a functional adult and some soy-fed weakling who burns water. You don’t need a rice cooker. … Read more